I often get asked the question, "How do you foster independence in Montessori?" 

If I gave you a pair of ice skates and told you to start skating even though you've never tried before, you'd probably have a tough time standing on the ice, let alone skating on your first attempt.   

This is what it can feel like to our children when we offer them activities that are not developmentally appropriate.

Dr. Montessori said to...Follow The Child.

The easiest way to foster independent play and focus is to offer activities that your child is truly interested in and at the right skill level for them.

When we choose activities or toys that are too hard, too easy, or are unrelated to the skills they're currently working on building, it's very likely to be an unsuccessful attempt.

The children will most likely have little interest and walk away from it pretty quickly.

Giving activities that are too challenging for the child doesn't hold their interest too long.  If the child is interested in an activity AND it is developmentally appropriate / at the child's current level, you'll likely see repetitive usage and interest which is exactly what we want.

Knowing that the child has been actively working with an activity of interest, you can then offer another activity with an added challenge.  For example, introducing a year old infant the object permanence box first, then introducing the one that has a drawer that opens and closes!  This is just the right amount of new challenge. It again, fully engages the child and also builds on their problem solving skills.

You can easily figure out what will engage your child simply by observing them. This is one of the key jobs of a Montessori teacher in the classroom.

Teachers spend time observing each child to ensure they have access to new activities that are the right fit.  They introduce appropriate next-step activities according to many things including their capabilities with the first activities in the sequence.

Parents can ask the following questions at home:

• What is my child drawn to?
• It is certain types of movement, gross motor or fine motor (i.e. nesting one object in another, throwing, building, climbing)?
• What are they immediately drawn to in a space (both a play area or any area of the home?)
• What do they tend to repeat over and over?

Once you figure that out, independent play will come so much easier.

Between social media and resuming of normal, in-person get togethers with other parents, it can be so tempting to compare our children.  Parents need to understand that each child is an individual and progresses at their own rate.  Try to follow your child and their own capabilities.  Comparing to other children and their skills at the same age may make us push our child harder or too soon.  It's a common mistake that can do your child a disservice.  They will gain the same skills when they are ready - I promise!  By building on the skills and interests of your own unique child, you'll foster a deep love of learning, along with more focused, independent play. 

Dina